Advice on dating after widowhood

06-Jun-2019 02:44 by 8 Comments

Advice on dating after widowhood - womanfordating

It sounds dour, resigned – the Victorian matriarch springs to mind, head to toe in black, and after all if anyone made a bad job of widowhood it was Queen Victoria.

When you wake to hear some worrying creak downstairs, no one else is going to go and investigate.

Finally, isn't it possible (probable, even) that a lot of women over fifty who are divorced don't WANT to be remarried? And we think it's time that women over a certain age stop being told that things are so dire for them.

There are far worse things than making it to fifty and being given the opportunity to re-emerge on the dating scene—things like actually being killed by a terrorist, for example.

Actually, not so far ahead: life expectancy for women in this country is 82, for men – 78.

But in reality, looking around, the gap seems more pronounced.

I have a running joke with one widow friend about what men are for.

They are for mowing lawns, putting out the rubbish, pulling champagne corks.I never anticipated life without my husband, any more than I gave much thought to what old age would be like. We arrive in this new situation, part of this new demographic, and have to find our way around.“Marital status”, says that box on a form and, crossly, I tick “widow”. It has its stereotype reflections – Widow Twankey, the Merry Widow, not to mention the foxy lady of the Scottish Widows advertisements, who looks as though she is not likely to remain alone for long.The ancient term for a widow was “a relict” – her husband’s relict. We are a new demographic – an element of the whole expanding body of over-75s that is giving pause for thought to the Department for Work and Pensions.We may be cluttering up surgeries and brandishing our Freedom Passes, but we are also a substantial group – and a significant one, I think, veterans of long relationships, learning how to live differently.Studies show men tend to marry down — someone slightly younger, less educated, making less money.